How do you feel about semi-child free weddings, where some children are invited yet others aren’t? Do you think it’s safe to assume kids of all ages are invited to the wedding unless the invitation specifically says it’s an adults only celebration?
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I assume kids aren’t invited unless they are specifically on the invite. Weddings are so extraordinarily expensive, I completely understand kid-free weddings. Plus, it is just a different feel with kids vs without kids at a function, that I respect the choice of the couple. We ran into this a year or so ago with a cousin. My sister brought her kids and my other sister and I didn’t. We were clearly right to not bring them, and my sister with the kids just looked rude.
I always believe it is the choice of the couple, though in general I don’t think young kids belong at weddings. There’s a lot of waiting, along with customs the kids don’t understand.
Even my husband (the last child) needed guidance at a wedding, like “you don’t put ketchup on prime rib.” And “fish doesn’t mean fish sticks.”
I remember a wedding where the bride specifically said no kids; we left ours at home. And someone else brought kids about the same age as mine (my mother was *furious*), and they were not well behaved, and that kind of solidified my opinion.
I agree with Jennifer and Harriet. In general, I don’t think children belong at formal occasions, and would never have taken ours. But ultimately, it depends on the wedding couple and the tone of the event. I, too, would not be happy to be around young children at a formal event. The last wedding we went to was specified “adults only”, and all the guests complied.
What about when the event isn’t completely child free and some are invited while others aren’t and there is no mention that the wedding is YOUR child free until after you’ve rsvp’d? And what age do you put on the kids, 10 and under? 16 and under?
If it is addressed to “and family” or includes the specific names of the child(ren), they’re invited. Otherwise, you need a babysitter. And if it is just addressed to you and your husband, that’s the sole extent of the invite. I don’t understand the question about age. If some kids were invited and others aren’t, then it sounds like the couple chose specific kids they did want there for some reason, but that didn’t mean they wanted it to be a super kid-friendly event.
What I mean by the age question is, what age cut-off would you put on a child free event? 5, 10, 16, 18 …. 21?
When my son got married, the cut off was 21, which eliminated many of my daughter-in-law’s numerous cousins. He said he’d make an exception if my niece from California was coming; he had lost track, however, and she was 25. 8)
LOL about losing track of the age of the 25 yr old. That’s hilarious!